I Didn't Plan To Be A Witch

I recently read I Didn’t Plan To Be A Witch by Linda Eyre. I read it because, like the title says, I did not ever plan to be a witch. I always thought of myself as a pretty nice person until I had kids and started losing my patience with them. Where did that grumpy side of me come from?

I had read little bits of this book a few years ago, but now finally read the whole thing. I really enjoyed it, especially the parts where she describes some crazy days at her house. Maybe she exaggerates, and maybe it’s because she has nine kids and I only have five, but they were way crazier than anything we have ever experienced here. That made me feel a little better about things. There are 31 chapters and each is written on a certain topic. Each chapter is pretty short and can be read independently so that was pretty nice. Since there is so much in this book, I thought I’d just write about a few specific chapters.

Chapter 3. The Key: Simplify, Simplify, Simplify. This chapter lists and explains 16 ways to simplify your life. Some that really struck me are: Set time limits for routine tasks. I used to have to do this when I was in school to get my work done, and I find it still works wonders for me. Encourage older children to take responsibility for younger children. This one is so great! Stephen and Anne are really good at getting shoes on littler people and getting their teeth brushed. And Naomi goes to the bathroom much more willingly when Ellen takes her as opposed to me! Use the toughest times to realize that the normal times aren’t so bad. Borrow four more children for a week and learn that your usual routine isn’t as difficult as you thought. I have to laugh about this one because about two days after I read it we ended up having four extra children stay at our house for about 24 hours while their mom had a baby. Life did seem pretty relaxed the next day!

Chapter 15. The Kid Is Always Right. In this chapter she talks about hearing a speaker at a business conference on the subject of “the customer is always right.” When asked what happens if the customer really is wrong the speaker said, “The customer is never wrong! Neither party is right or wrong. You have to try to look at the problem through the other person’s eyes. You will find that by looking at the problem from his perspective, although it may not be correct from your perspective, you can see why he thinks he is right. It’s often hard to take, but a great manager can always say: ‘I see your point. I understand what you mean. You’re right. Let’s work this out.’” Then she explains that the same thing can apply to our relationships with our children. She says, “Too often, we become authoritarian parents who think we are always right. When it comes to a conflict, we don’t bother to give the same courtesy to our children as we would to a brother or friend.” That kind of stung me because I realized that I do that all the time! I was feeling so terrible and then get to this part. “After all, one conflict settled with sympathy and understanding out of every ten conflicts that occur is better than none, especially if we understand each child often enough to let him know that we really care.” Life is all about trying to do a little better each day, not about being perfect the very next day. So … I will try to keep this in mind. The Kid Is Always Right!

Chapters 28 - 29. Enjoying the Present – No Matter How Bad It Is! and Keep Looking Up. These two chapters go together in my mind because they remind me of a couple of talks from this last General Conference. Of course, the first is President Monson’s talk, Finding Joy in the Journey. The other is Elder Bednar’s talk, Pray Always. In chapter 28 Linda Eyre says, “Gratitude can help us enjoy the present.” When thinking of all the good things there are in life, and all the blessings I have been given, and thinking of all the wonderful times I am having with my children right now, how can I help but be happy? And when I pray to my loving Heavenly Father who has given all this happiness to me, and I thank Him for it, how can I not be full of joy?